Golden Anti-Facebook Article

I got hooked reading anti-facebook articles, searching for one that best sums up why I don’t have an account in a way that people might understand.

This article is gold:



20 Responses to “Golden Anti-Facebook Article”

  1. Christine Says:

    You die, finally. No one notices because you weren’t there to post that as your status message. The end.

    HAHA – that made my day.

  2. CezainValsol Says:

    The only reason I bother using Facebook is because I’m out of the loop with everything and have very little contact with people because they’re so damn busy. So really, its purpose is not much more different than that of my blog.

    I do agree its stupid, but until people come up with some sort of composite all around way of letting me know whats going on and whatnot, I’m afraid I’m going to have to remain on Facebook even if I only check it once or twice every week.

  3. Sean Hagen Says:

    @Cezain: That’s what email, phones, and IM are for. Or even twitter. Or your blog. Centralizing all that in one place isn’t a good thing ( especially with all the privacy problems present on a site like Facecrack ). If it’s really important to know every detail of what people are doing, then talk to them more often.

    @Paul: Good article, although the fact that the author is a pompous ass from Ontario lessens my enjoyment of the article ( for some reason, his “Code” section is his “About Me” section, where he comes off as bottom-of-the-barrel stupid and pompous ).

    There are probably lots of good reasons to use Facecrack. However, in light of all the problems they have with security ( <- just a few articles on Facecracks’ security problems ) and such, it’s basically a zero-sum game ( ie, pros+cons=zero benefit ). Plus the only people I want to keep in touch with I either see regularly, or will actually respond to email/phone calls. Plus, my Google Analytics stats are a much more meaningful way of tracking how many people actually care about what I think/say/do.

  4. Christine Says:

    sad. sean didn’t leave me an @christine.

  5. Adrienn Says:

    yeeeahhh.. the guy’s a bit of an ass, but still a pretty hilarious article on “Facecrack” as Mr. Hagen so nicely put it. :P

  6. CezainValsol Says:

    Sean (and everyone else, really),

    I hate to sound like the whiny bitch here, but feel free to conclude that at the end of this. As long as I get my point across, because it seems to be shooting over people’s heads.

    Keep in mind I’m bitching at the crap-ful situation that is my bad luck, and not at you.

    E-mail: I e-mail people often enough, and they pretty much never get back to me. I’ve e-mailed Paul and Ray (to name a few) about two or three times in the past 2 weeks, give or take, and its made no difference. When I e-mail people, I try to limit it so I don’t feel like I’m nagging them to death with e-mails to the point its nearly spam, but still, I figure that even if you’re really busy, you should able to read at least one of the e-mails sent about twice every week/every other week to a few times in a month. Apparently, this is not the case, but again, its not an attack on anyone. If you’ve forgotten my e-mail, here’s the new one:

    Phone: The phone isn’t a dead medium of communication? Good. Because in my experience, it has been. The best way by phone to reach me is contact me at my home phone and leave a message with whoever’s there or in my inbox. Yes. I have my own voice mail inbox. Use it. That should help things, but in most cases, it doesn’t make a difference. For the cellphone (which technically speaking, isn’t even mine right now), its more limited because I don’t have Internet or SMS or text-messaging, blah blah blah on it. Not even caller ID. (This is bound to change in May, however, when the plan ends.) I do call people from time to time but usually either no one is home or I have to leave a message, which is fine. Thing is though, that after about 3 (or in some extreme cases, 5 or 6 attempts spaced out over a few days or over the week), I still don’t get a reply. I do agree that I have a bad habit of turning it off, though, mostly because the battery can’t make up its mind if its fully charged or on the verge of inevitable death. That and I’m usually pretty convinced that its not worth killing my battery if the only person who’s going to call me is my mom who’s forgotten I go to school. That’s my own fault, though, so I guess I’ll leave it on more often. I’d love to tell you my mobile and home phone number, but you’re all going to have to e-mail me to get those.

    IM: Oh, goodness. IM >_<. A few months back the computer had a problem where if I was online, it would send people spam. I’m pretty sure that didn’t help anything. (It’s been resolved since I got my notebook.) Most of you are never on. Ever. I know because I tend to either be on it (MSN Messenger) a fair bit, or I leave it on after I get home from classes seeing as I bring my notebook to school so I don’t have to use the crappy library/computer lab computers @ Douglas. I got a feeling that I might be missing a few of you from my list (probably based on me trying to narrow down what accounts are and aren’t being used), so if you want to contact me by IM, it’s Please send me an e-mail when you add me so I don’t forget or just let me know its you (whoever it is) when I’m online so I can catch it later. If you don’t see me online for a bit, its because I’m still trying to get the other people to add me, so send me an e-mail if it comes to that.(Again,…seriously, help me help you help me.)

    Blog: I’ve started way too many blogs and joined way too many social-networking sites in an attempt to stay in touch with people without having to go about it like a manic. It tends to have the opposite effect. Well, WordPress is sort-of my last bastion against the denizens of my God-awful luck in this situation. So far, I haven’t got much reply or anything, but the fact that Paul left two comments (one telling me to turn off comment approval, which I didn’t even realize, thanks Paul!), means I’m off to an okay start. Mark referred to me to it (WordPress) as a result of a mad exception in which I e-mailed him about it and he got back to me almost immediately. I’ve passed around information about my blog to most of your sites (you included, Sean) and hopefully you’ve all recieved it, but if not, I’m sure you all know to click on my name in the comments and add the site to your list of blogs (coughPaulcough, get to it), or add it to your favourites. I will happily note that some progress is being made since you (Sean) got back to my comment, and people followed it. (Hello Adrienn and Christine!) Some people I’m having trouble informing of the blog simply because the blog doesn’t seem to exist anymore or it requires permission of some sort. (Nathaniel’s blog, tried to contact him about it, too.) Best thing you all can do is check out the blog and/or give me any suggestions you have about the blog or otherwise. (It’s slightly lacking right now.) Click on my name or go

    Twitter: This is the first time I’ve ever heard of Twitter. (Insert laughs at how behind-the-times I am. Blah blah blah.) I guess I’ll check it out and see what I can do with it.

    Done my bitching session, I’ll try to remedy whatever I brought up and vicea versa for the rest of you. Thank you ^_^.

    Thanks for the comment, Sean.

  7. Paul Romein Says:

    haha…wow, that was like an entire blog post INSIDE my blog disguised as a comment!

    veeeeeery sneaaaaky….

  8. Adrienn Says:

    hahaha… nicely put Paul!! it’s exactly what I was thinking!

  9. Nathaniel Says:

    All in all, meh. Too controversial, but still tempted to delete facebook.

  10. CezainValsol Says:

    Heh, I didn’t mean to take away your fire. Sorry, Paul. I just got caught up in the moment ^_^ (anime sweat-drop.)

  11. Sasha Says:

    Haha that was an excellent article. I don’t actually think you can delete your facebook account, although you can change your name. I don’t feel much of an invasion of privacy… I’m a pretty open person and sort of depend on exposure for my work. On a side note… and now that I’ve thought more about the article… I didn’t actually make my facebook account – a friend decided that I absolutely needed one and signed me up lol. That is a little obsessive and creeperly :P

  12. Ray Says:

    So I’ve been thinking about going into business…it seems there’s a real need for a Facebook life-insurance policy. You know, a confidential group that you pay 5$ a year to and when you die, we pull up your sealed information packet, login in to your Facebook account and change your status to “Mike is dead. Really and sincerely dead.”

    Anybody wanna sign up for my service? Because really…its inconsiderate of you to think only of yourself. You may not care you’re not around anymore once your dead, but other people have a right to know. Cause I hate when I send invites to a function and people don’t even answer them…that’s just unspeakable. Only 5$! C’mon!!

  13. Ray Says:

    Oh, and, btw. Mike? A little belated, I know, but…

    This is Paul’s Blog. Do you realize you posted 1,001 words in 10 paragraphs? And you didn’t even mention his name enough times to account for once every two paragraphs. Oh…and you didn’t say the word Facebook even once. Which is what his entire blogpost was about.

    So not that its even remotely my place aside from the way I’m making it so, but its not a question of length dude, its content. You weren’t even posting with the intent to brush on anything anyone had really said.

  14. Paul Romein Says:

    I’m tempted to sign up for facebook just for that service Ray! You’d surely have my $5…

  15. CezainValsol Says:

    I did apologize already and it was all in relation to Sean replying to something I said about Facebook.

    I apologize again. Feel free to delete my comment, Paul. On the plus side of things, most of you probably know how to get to my blog by now, so you can all contribute to overly massive posts if you feel I’ve besmirched Paul that badly just to even things up. Really. I’m sorry. I was replying to something Sean said.

    On the side, I think your idea is a good one, Ray. I’d gladly donate for that, if you’re serious.

    No hard feelings to anyone as I said previously.

  16. Adrienn Says:

    yeah i’m in for the 5 bucks

  17. Chris Fader Says:

    Yeah i gotta say I think the article was crap, everything he says is making assumptions about the people reading it. If you use facebook without going overboard or being an idiot there is nothing wrong with it. It’s the same as everything else in that sense, there will always be idiots who make good stuff bad. Anyway i wanted to defend Mike against rays comment… partly to be confrontational and mostly because i get his point and didn’t find it actually off topic. In fact his argument made more sense to me than the guys article. This is already longer than i intended…

  18. zaklady bukmacherskie Says:

    Ciekawa strona, bede ja odwiedzal czesciej, pozdro

  19. Phenceavevy Says:

    Hi people

    As a fresh user i just want to say hi to everyone else who uses this bbs :D

  20. arratebaicE Says:

    What is bumburbia?